Well, at last I feel like my 'nose day' as I have christened it, is finally in sight!
I am booked with Mr Woolford for the 15th April 2010, so just over two months to go now, and I feel like I have waited forever! In truth I will have actually waited for around six months following my consultation with Mr W, and about 25 years from when my obsessive hatred for my nose first began! So not quite forever; and after 25 years, two months doesn't seem like such a long time!
As this is my first blog, maybe I should start with the tale of woe regarding my not insignificant hooter!
Where should I start. Ah yes. The tip. No, not just the tip, the droopy tip. Droopy tips run in my family - its a fact! My dear grandad, may he rest in pease, had it, my dad has it, and so does his sister... the thing is, THEIR droopy tips just seem so much less, well, droopy than mine! My aunty's droop is actually a very pretty, feminine droop. Not so mine. Mine is a big droop. I mean BIG. It droops at the best of times, but with a straight face - i.e. a complete poker face with practically zero expression, my droop is just about bearable. Hence this is the way I prefer to be photographed (although I do not like being photographed at all, truth be told!). This is the reason for the many serious (aka miserable) images of me in various family albums. Ok, maybe thats an exaggeration, there are SOME smiley ones. But many have been takn of me 'off guard'. And I do not like them. Not one bit! Anyway, I digress, as I said, straight faced, the droop is not toooo bad.... but... when I dare to change my expression to even the slightest inkling of a smile, the droop well and truly comes into its own. Ah yes, tis a loud and proud droop - which from a front view, when I am smiling, kind of resembles a large arrow pointing down to my mouth. And the bigger the smile, the more "hello boys" the arrow becomes. And then there's the bridge of my nose. Oh dear, the bridge. I detest the bridge and the droop in equal measures. The bridge is flat and wide. Very flat. Very wide. My poor nose has no definition :-( . Now, the dodgy flat wide bridge is the legacy of a rather nasty accident I endured when I was around 10 years old. Without going into a long winded saga, during a school holiday, with a well known adventure holiday provider (who shall remain nameless in case of the unlikely event they read this blog), I had an accident whilst partaking in the pony trekking activity. This resulted in a fractured skull (a very serious one, I'm actually lucky to be here), a fractured jaw and a broken nose. I was left unconsious for 12 hours and awoke, in a strange hospital, with two black (and I do mean black, not brown, not purple, but black) eyes that were swollen shut, and hair that looked stawberry blonde. I am, and was, blonde - the rather fetching strawberry blonde effect was due to the rather lovely streaks of my own blood that remained in my hair for some time, as due to my head injuries it was a tad difficult to wash! The first time I saw myself in a mirror was rather scary - I looked like a midgit version of Uncle Fester (except his eyes were open, I had to prise mine open with my fingers to actually see anything). Anyway, all in all I was not a pretty sight, but luckily the panda eyes and fetching red streaks eventually left, alas the damage to my nose was rather more permanent.
So, there I was, age 10, with what was the start of some unflattering changes to my nose (not to mention the extensive dental surgery, and I am a complete coward with the dentist lol).
I have learnt, through the lovely Mr W (he is a very very very nice man) that even my dreaded droop factor may be as droopilicious as it is because of the damage my nose endured. Apparently an injury of that sort at a young age can affect how the nose develops in its entirety. Lucky me!!
So, without going into any further detail, that is how my nose came to be in its current droopy, flat, wide state!
My real hatred of my nose began at secondary school, when I made the mistake of mentioning to a 'friend' that I thought my nose was not very, erm, pretty! Cue years of nose related name calling, names which are so bad that I cannot put them on this blog; followed by an even bigger complex about my nose, which has remained with me, and been an obsession ever since.
Don't get me wrong, there are other things in my life than my nose of course. I am blessed with a wonderful family and friends (not, might I add, the friend who let everyone know about my nose paranoia, and set off the name calling!); I have a good job, beautiful children, and a happy, full life. Most people think that my nose obsession is slightly weird. Many people say that my nose is fine. But in my eyes, it is absolutely not fine!!!! And at the end of the day my pet obsession, i.e. this thing that lives in the centre of my face, is something that has plagued me, to varying degrees, for more or less as long as I can remember. Possibly due to the feeling that 'this is not the nose I was born with'!!
About 12 years ago, with no prior research, I attended my first consultation about getting my nose corrected, with Transform. At the time I decided I couldn't afford it - which with hindsightm due to the lack of research, was possibly not a bad thing! And on and off I have looked into it several times throughout the in-between years, but for one reason or another, I have never gone ahead.
Fast forward to 2009. With the help and support of my partner (who loves me as I am, but knows how unhappy I am about my hooter), we decided I should do the research, find a good surgeon, and go for it! My research led me to discover the 'Look Your Best' site - and what a godsend it has been! I had not realised how ill-informed I was. I always thought it was a case of - book your op, go through the op, wake up with wonderful feminine nose on face!
So, after researching , and visiting, vari0us surgeons, I eventually came across Mr Tim Woolford, an ENT who specialises in rhinoplasty, who as luck would have it is local to me. At my first consultation with Mr Woolford I knew I wanted him to be the man with whom I would trust the future of my nose! Unlike other surgeons, he did not promise me that I would wake up with a nose that was perfect in every way! But he KNEW what it was about my nose I did not like, he suggested some changes (which I am happy with), and promises he will do the absolute best he can do, without damaging my nose (always a good thing!). He also spotted that some of the damage to my nose is impacting on my nasal passages; and apparently I will also breathe easier after the surgery (hopefully). More importantly, I BELIEVE that this man WILL do his absolute best to get a good, and safem result.
As an aside, my partner is hoping against hope that it may also ease my rather horrendous snoring lol. Yes, I snore like a goodun... I have even woke myself up with it at times, it is BAD!!!!!! (Actually Mr W thinks it might help with this, although he has warned my partner that there's no guarantee - so ear-plus may be the only solution!!!)
So, with my date looming, I am now excited, nervous, scared, full of anticipation - all the mixture of emotions that any of you reading this who have gone through this, or are about to go through this, will know all about. I still struggle to believe that after all these years of wishing and dreaming about this happening (sounds dramatic but its the truth); I am finally going to do it!!! How strange to be excited about the prospect of someone hacking at my face! So - Mr Woolford - I entrust my droopy, wide, flat hooter to your (hopefully) capable hands! And thank you to all at Look Your Best for making my journey so far so much easier - you are all stars x x
9 March 2010
Well, here I am again. I actually thought I would never visit this site again! Why? Because my 'nose day' was cancelled :-(. WAS is the operative word however and it is now back on again. Without going into the ins and outs, hows, whys, wheres, whens etc etc, I was devastated. So devastated that I cried. Buckets. And now the op is back on I am overjoyed, but very cautiously overjoyed - I have a feeling of 'what if it gets cancelled again' going on.
The date is looming ever closer. Keep trying to imagine self with new nose. New and hopefully improved nose!!!
Anyway, I am up far too late (as usual) so this is just a short update! I will give the full details of the 'nose cancellation saga' at a future date, hopefully not too long away! I am so busy at the moment that I will probably meet myself coming down the stairs as I go up them to bed!!! Still, its taking my mind off worrying and making the weeks fly by!!!
x o x
